"Koch" with a Short "O"

I have been watching some soap operas sporadically because of three reasons: I'm doing something else when these shows are on, my erratic schedule arriving home at night and I channel surf a lot. But of all the local soap operas I have seen, Tayong Dalawa has the perfect casting. No, I won't comment about the plot nor the roles of each character but the casting that made the story line alive.

Tayong Dalawa posted the second highest rating soap from the Kapamilya channel. They were able to topple Kapuso's Dingdong-Marian tandem. The casting has never been so perfect. Each one fits to his role especially the demented Agot Isidro, the funny, street-smart grandmother Gina Pareno and that of Cherry Pie.

The highest rating goes to May Bukas Pa. It's been extended till next year I heard. Desiree Verdadero (playing the mayor's mistress) acts well but looking at her and the suave Albert Martinez (the mayor) seems a bit odd. I'm not sure why. Desiree is pretty alright but maybe a sexier personality will be perfect for the role. Angelica Panganiban maybe.

Another miscast is John Estrada as Lorna Tolentino's husband in Dahil May Isang Ikaw. It's not that he is way younger than Lorna. It doesn't show really but there could have been an actor in the caliber of Lorna and Gabby (the soap's senior leading man) which could make this a casting coup. On my mind is Albert Martinez but he's still in another soap.

Sid Lucero is perfect for the role of an obsessed man. He is intense without over acting. I hate him. He is disgusting. He is very effective in his role. Surprisingly, Karylle gives out a realistic performance. She has a nice speaking voice for one. She can carry a role of someone that you should hate but instead will take pity on because of her obsession and her love for her mother.

Oh yes, Dahil May Isang Ikaw revolves around obsession. John's character is obsessed with Lorna. Chinchin's character is obsessed with Gabby. Gabby and Lorna are obsessed with each other so are Jericho and Kristine. Sid is obsessed with Kristine and Karylle with Jericho. My, oh, my.

The biggest miscast is Zanjo Marudo as Martin in the Filipino version of Lovers in Paris. I knew it from the very start. Martin is supposed to be a happy-go-lucky street smart rich guy. He's supposed to be somebody cosmopolitan. He has traveled the world and stayed for some time in Paris as a vagabond.

But when you see Zanjo, and hear him speak, you'll wonder if he has been anywhere but in the streets of Tralala. He cannot even pronounce the word "coach" properly. The scene sometimes is suppose to be in its dramatic highlight and suddenly you'll hear Zanjo say "koch", "koch" with a short "o". Can somebody coach him how to be in his role so he won't look like a sore thumb when in the same scene with the dashing Piolo Pascual and still handsome Christopher de Leon? Zanjo is fine but certainly miscast as Martin.

Relational Aggression

I was mulling over my daughter's predicament in school involving one of her best friends...or shall I say ex-best friend (whom I will refer here as Girl Friend or GF). Girl Friend suddenly gave her the silent treatment, without any warning. They had no arguments nor misunderstanding that could have triggered GF's attitude.

At first I just listened to her and advised her to give Girl Friend some time to talk about it. I want to think that this is just one of those things experienced by preteens and nothing to worry about. But each day stories I hear from my daughter get bothersome. I know my daughter is hurting because someone she considers one of her best friends has been giving her cold-shoulder treatment.

She was at a lost why it happened. I helped her sort out the things that transpired between them the past days but we cannot find anything unusual. My daughter said GF just stopped talking to her. Worst is Girl Friend "steals" the attention of their common friends. Girl Friend cuts in the middle of her conversation with a common friend and tries to leave her out of the conversation.

My daughter gets angry when this happens. But I know, she is hurt more than angry. She just leaves the group when Girl Friend starts on her.

You see I like Girl Friend (or used to like given the way she acts towards my daughter these days). She is bubbly and always greets me. We have no idea what happened.

I keep on telling my daughter even before that one of the keys to a lasting friendship is communication. Friends should be open if there are things they need to tell each other that can affect their relationship.

I was really surprised and very proud of my daughter's reaction to Girl Friend. Without me telling her exactly what to do, I learned she wrote Girl Friend a letter asking her what happened. Did she do something that hurt her? If she did, she is not aware of it but she apologized for whatever it is that she had done wrong.

Even older, more mature people will have a hard time apologizing and bring down their pride to patch up a ruffled friendship. What my daughter did was a very mature way of dealing with her friendship with Girl Friend.

I commended her action. I am really proud of her. I also told her she did her part and that's that. I don't want her to appear clingy especially to someone who does not seem to appreciate her effort. My daughter needs to learn too when it's time to move on. Fine if she does not respond, fine if Girl Friend goes back to their normal friendship. My daughter said, "well, that's more than fine. That will be better." Again I was surprised. Her reaction just goes to show she still wants to preserve their friendship and ready to forgive and forget whatever it is which made Girl Friend treat her coldly.

After a week, Girl Friend responded to my daughter's note. She said she finds my daughter irritating and vain (GF actually used a word I'd rather not mention here. It was really mean). My daughter chose not to answer her.

I was wondering if Girl Friend's attitude could be a form of bullying. I am sure it is. I just want to understand it more. It may not be in the form of physical or verbal abuse but it is definitely emotional abuse. I want to read more about it and how it should be dealt with. I chanced upon several websites discussing about the "silent treatment" as a form of Relational Aggression (RA).

Relational aggression is described as any behavior that is intended to harm someone by damaging or manipulating relationships with others (Crick & Grotpeter, 1995). Unlike other types of bullying, relational aggression is not as overt, or noticeable as physical aggression. However, the effects can be long lasting.

While relational aggression can take many forms, some of the methods include:
* Exclusion
* Ignoring
* Malicious gossip and rumor spreading
* Taunts and insults
* Teasing
* Intimidation
* Manipulative affection
* Alliance building
* Cyberbullying

Source: Mean Girls---Realities of Relational Aggression

It is much like the mean girls we watch on movies and television, the Queen B and the acting leader of the pact. Girl Friend is not as worst as how RAs are described above but who knows, she must be going to that point as she is trying to isolate my daughter from their common friend.

I am still weighing things if I am going to discuss this with the class adviser and the mother of GF whom I see in school. I had a few encounters with her and she seemed accommodating. Will discussing this make things better?

Generally my daughter is doing good. She's affected because she feels a friend betrayed her but I don't see any signs of depression nor lack of interest in school. She has other friends she gets along with in her class. In fact she just got accepted in their music group in school right after her first audition.

That is what I always tell my daughter. Keep a lot of friends and don't be confined with a clique. Explore and be active in extra-curricular activities she is truly interested in.

Back to my question, shall I just keep on giving advices to my daughter and let this "issue" of GF die down? I am giving it one more chance but another incident I mentioned above should occur I would request for a meeting with the adviser and the parent. If this kind of bullying continues, clearly it needs attention and resolution by adults - parents and teachers.

I'm hoping for the best.

Michael Jackson, This Is It!

I have been waiting for Michael Jackson's This Is It as soon as it was announced there is going to be a documentary of the concert to be shown in theaters. As the day of the premiere gets nearer I couldn't help but quietly anticipate the movie. It was a mixed feeling. I was happy I will be able to watch him sing and dance on stage even if they will just be snippets of the whole O2 concert. There was a tinge of sadness and then longing that this was the last time he will ever produce and perform.

At last I have watched it with my husband and daughter. See even children love Michael Jackson. They didn't even know much about him until his death which was a world wide news. He was very endearing. His appeal made a mark across generations.

I eagerly waited for the sneak previews to end and sit comfortably and savor what MJ will offer to his fans all over the world. On my mind this could be too commercialized and will only have a few footage of his actual rehearsal. I was just too happy to watch how much respect this documentary gave Michael Jackson.

His passion for his craft was very clear. I saw a very healthy and enthusiastic Michael Jackson. Reports said he dragged himself to his rehearsals and appear tired. None of these were obvious in the documentary. Everyone felt his enthusiasm and his energy.

All of fifty years and yet he danced like every bone in his body was made for the fluid moves and glides he makes.

There was no body double for this documentary. Everything was MJ. One, people can feel if there is anything fake here. Two, that will be too obvious as MJ has a certain move, sound and smile that no impersonator can consistently imitate.

MJ ran the show. Kenny Ortega was the director but Michael always has the final say. He knows what to do. His ideas seem to crop up in an instant. He was one creative person indeed.

This movie showed how meticulous he was. He wanted everything perfectly done. He was supportive of his team. He wanted them to shine. A very secured person Michael Jackson was in that sense.

He was a great leader, always inspiring his people, always calm and collected dealing with them.

The man was thin yes, but it never looked like he lived on drugs as was reported. I looked beyond the reputation the tabloids created of him through the years. Here was a man truly dedicated to his craft. That was pretty obvious if we are to look at his past performances. Just that his personal life was more of an interest than how he was as a producer, director, singer, dancer. This Is It had given us a glimpse of how he was sans all the controversies and grandiose lifestyle.

I even liked the way he looked in this documentary. Never mind that black heavily padded blazers, he was awesome! He knew what he wanted on stage. He looked manly with his long hair down, chewing gum and reviewing some scenes and auditioning dancers.

He was a great motivator. It makes me wonder why he wasn't able to do it to himself. As the fans said..."F-U-*-K the press! Michael, you're the best!" I hope to God he knew he was the best and hoped the he lived his life the best way he could. Maybe things will be different. For the life of me, I don't know why "legends" should end quite tragically. Their untimely end adds to their enigma? I could only wish that MJ's death is a hoax. Reality check....

Michael was a gift. I am glad there is This Is It, a concert documentary of the greatest performer that ever lived. I will definitely buy the DVD and will complete all the DVDs of his past concerts.

I clapped excitedly as the movie begun. I clapped admiringly with the rest of the audience as the show ended. Let me say this once again, Michael Jackson is the man!

The Lost Symbol

Finally I've finished The Lost Symbol (TLS) by Dan Brown late last night. (Thanks to Julie for the book.) I often say that if you've ever read one or two books of Brown, you have read each of his books. You are just waiting for the catch. And you probably know what the catch is even before you reach the middle of the story. The clues in TLS book did not come right away but still, you can already predict long before or somewhere near the climax of the story.

I enjoyed The Da Vinci Code (the book, not the movie) but after that, everything else I read from his books is just too Dan Brown. Predictable. Formulaic. Too contrived. Add more synonymous words or phrases here.

As for TLS, it was a roller coaster ride for me. At some point I was bored, I got excited on a few. A lot of situations are just too forced. Some conversations to emphasize I-don't-know-what-point are just too long. They can actually be deleted. One example I can't believe Brown even included here is how Katherine, the Noetic scientist, was able to weigh the human soul. Geezaz. Right. The way it was delivered here was really mediocre.

The build up on the national crisis fell short. In these days when scandals of high profile celebrities and "important" people can be categorized as common, who else gets shocked in a magnitude that will stun the world as described in the book.

This Dan Brown book is actually a soap opera, a high tech soap opera. The climax was good. The mother in me was touched. That twist satisfied me though I already guessed what it could be while nearing that part of the story. I excitedly read on to see if my theory was right. I felt victorious, lol.

I cannot find any reason why such a respected, intelligent Harvard professor can be duped twice. One, a phone call from a supposed assistant of his mentor. Second, a police woman in a hurry informing him about the state of his friend. The situations are just too obvious not to be in doubt.

I cannot find any reason also why after such a heartbreaking revelation about Langdon's friend's son was suddenly set aside by everyone to talk about "the lost symbol". Recovery from the revelation was so easy, huh. I thought it will end there but there are still a few pages left.

I was waiting for this book to end. I was really interested with their conversation about the power of one's mind - what your mind can perceive, your body can achieve. But heck, it's just too long. I will gladly read The Secret again.

One engrossing part for me is how Washington D.C. and the Capitol building were described. Looking out for all those symbols and signs would be very fun.

I still praise the research mixed with fiction on how the dots connected but there were so many scenes are like a repetition of the previous scenes. Doubts, surprised reactions, being convinced...and the cycle goes on.

There are no new developments in this book. What could have been a great plot that should have been explored, exploited further is about Mal'akh. That could have been more interesting.

Basic Customer Service Goes A Long Way

I must say if there is one thing that Typhoons Ondoy and Pepeng taught me, it's to be more consciously appreciative of what I have, most especially my relationships with my loved ones and with the people I encounter daily, strangers or not. Be more patient. Know what really matters. These are the things I have developed through the years but now more than ever, I have learned to be consistent in demonstrating them when the situation calls for it.

This attitude manifests even on the simplest, most trivial things. Like my internet connection. My connection for two days now have been intermittent again. Yes, intermittent again. This was the scenario for three weeks last September up to the
first 3 days of October. I almost jumped for joy when it finally stabilized. But barely two weeks the connection is crappy again. The complaint period was longer than the good service I was having. I am paying for this service and being a loyal customer, I deserve a 100% functional DSL at any given time.

I admit the intermittent issue got the better of me for an hour or so. I attributed it to my PMS but right away I felt sorry I was not able to get hold of my temper. There were other productive things to do on a Saturday afternoon than worry myself over an internet connection.

I made an action plan about this, moved on and did not bother myself about the connection. It also helps that the customer service of Bayantel DSL is generally respectful especially the one I've talked to today. I regret I was not able to get his name. His customer service is ideal and worthy of emulation by his peers. Of all the customer tech support reps, he was the most logical I've talked to.

I know that he is protecting their brand, careful of what he was saying but I know too he sincerely empathized with me as a disgruntled, frustrated customer. He did not answer me with scripted, generic phrases. This is his job and he's doing it great. Let me applaud him for that. I will get his name later so I can commend him when I send an email to their department.

I have talked about the intermittent connection of Bayantel DSL twice or thrice in this blog. Let me just say also that the reason why I haven't left Bayantel DSL yet after all the complaints is that there are people who listens from the other end. A few are knowledgeable, some are just okay, tolerable. I just don't know why their technicians cannot pinpoint the cause of the problem. In any case, Bayantel DSL's recurring intermittent connection will be the reason why I will change ISPs, but pray tell, what is a better choice? PLDT DSL so my neighbor said. We'll see if I will get convinced in the next weeks to come.

Good interaction is vital in any transaction no matter how small it is. Simple things mean a lot. These simple things I get to appreciate now more than ever. It does not mean I will be passive about the whole thing but customer service can buy time in some cases. A simple act of sincere customer service goes a long way for me.

First Stop: Bookstore

Almost always our first stop when we go to the mall is the bookstore. Both me and my daughter are book lovers. But my daughter can beat me to finish a new book. One time she was able to read a 300 page book in one day. I often think her books are one of her motivations to finish her school work so she can continue reading them.

She has passed the stage of Dr. Seuss and Roald Dahl but these books she treasures. She loves Amelia, Madison Finn, Candy Apple, Meg Cabbot, mostly books created for middle school children. I know when she gets to be a little older she will appreciate one of my favorite books of all time - J.D. Salinger's Catcher in the Rye.

There are times it gets her a while to choose a book. She looks on practically each book on the shelf, pull out what she likes and starts browsing on the pages. If she reads faster than I do, she takes longer than I do in choosing a book.


Look, look and look some more.


Finally she got one, sits her herself comfortably on the floor and prepares to read a few pages before she decides if she's having it.


She couldn't wait till we get home to start reading some more.


***Read more sharing at Mommy Journey.

Blog Action Day 2009: Climate Change

We have been experiencing erratic weather patterns for several years now. We find ourselves in the middle of strong rains during summer months. In other cases the day is unevenly divided to wet or damp and scorching hot. Oftentimes we travel on the road experiencing two different weathers in areas just adjacent to each other. We are saying the weather sequences were not like they used to be.

"The weather is so weird!" Like most people, that's my favorite expression for this crazy weather pattern. I blurt out, almost nonchalantly, this is the effect of global warming or climate change. That's it and then I go about the normal daily business as if nothing else matters.

Until recent events made me realize the impact of climate change. Typhoon Ondoy (Ketsana) submerged 80% of Metro Manila underwater as well some parts of neighboring provinces. A week after, Typhoon Pepeng (Parma) ravaged Northern Luzon. Huge amount of money, unwavering faith and courage, continuous moral support are necessary in the rebuilding of lives and properties.

Nowadays, the slightest rain and cloudiness alarm people. Facebook statuses are about the latest weather update as well as the latest weather related worries. People are afraid. I know some people who cannot have a good sleep when it rains incessantly during the night.

A tragedy made us realize how nasty the effects of climate change is. Manifestations such as strong rains which we have not experienced ever in our lives surprised us with devastating flood waters. Water world. What is next?

True, both the people and the government have their own major shortcomings before, during and after Ondoy and Pepeng. Climate change was not a priority in the government's agenda so it seems. Disaster preparedness was zero. Nobody had seen it coming. Did we, us people, take time to think and actually do our part to protect Mother Earth from global warming?

Now you can hear about climate change discussions from almost every group of people. The government is passing the Climate Change Act of 2009 and will create a Climate Change Commission.

As a citizen of Planet Earth, what can I do?

I will understand the platforms of all the presidential candidates and they must include concrete action plans on climate change and environment protection. Urban planning for one needs to get the government's serious study, recommendation and implementation. This includes strict laws and protocols on waste management system.

Save electricity. I have a habit of turning the television on even if I am doing another thing. Let me break that habit. Continue using energy saving lights.

Reduce, reuse, recycle. Also, I will regularly use cloth bags whenever we do our groceries.

Make the shortest route possible, schedule logistics of errands to save on gas. Take the train whenever possible.

Little things like what I have mentioned can make a big difference if religiously implemented. Sharing during home owners' association meetings and office meetings are ways to encourage others to do the same thing. There are a lot we can learn through sharing.

My daughter is already aware of global warming and climate change as they are being discussed in school. What better way to reinforce her awareness but let her be involved in the things we do to protect our Mother Earth. This is her future after all.

***Read more about climate change from bloggers from all over the world at Blog Action Day 2009.

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